Who am I? I ask this question a lot. Maybe you ask the same. Years of dealing with a wide range of intense emotions and feelings have made this question complicated. All of my thoughts have given me a lot to sort through. Rational or otherwise. Who am I? I am all of it. I am peace and calm. I am fire and ice. I … Continue reading I am Fire and Ice

I have been thinking about writing this story for over a year now. For multiple reasons, it has proven very difficult to write about, let alone speak of. Most of what I write deals with the depressive side of my illness. It is what I experience most often. There is also less stigma attached to it then there is to the other extreme. Mania. Something … Continue reading An Unforgettable Winter

The reading and writing world is full of quotes. I found some quotes that fit well with some of the different stages I have experienced with my disorders. It turned out to be a very interesting activity. Depression: “And the worst thing about it was that you began to feel as if you had always lived on that ship, in that darkness, and to wonder … Continue reading My Illness in (a few) Quotes

Smudged and dirty. It is the window through which I watch. Through which I see. The man sits in a wooden chair. He looks familiar, but the dim light does not let me clearly see his features. Mom might think that he could use a haircut. Shadowy figures surround him. There isn’t much I can say to describe them. They are mysterious. And shadowy, did … Continue reading The Window

The path has been pretty muddy as of late. Energy has been hard to come by. A lot of sleeping, a lot of brain fog. Some of the time spent with a clear head has been very difficult. Sadness, loneliness, and anxiety have been hanging around a bit more often than I’d like. Depressive episodes have a way of making me feel like I’m losing … Continue reading Falling or Climbing?